And the new system hit my nerves

I can be patient with how difficult my work can be.

But ever since I am not reporting directly to my boss Maxime anymore, and reporting to my other colleague as direct superior, I feel unmotivated.

I know that leadership style from one person to another is different. Not because of their nationality, ethnicity, colors.. But one person is uniquely different from one to another. Everyone is raised differently. Grow up differently. Nurtured differently. And accepting things differently.

If a person is receiving the proper support he or she needed, they will grow as a good leader, insignificantly.. because they are made to believe that they are true leader to his people.

Maybe I am just lucky to live in this non-intimidated world for five years...where work system has never pissed me off. I am pampered with whatever I needed, trusted with all the tasks, receive merits for what I did, ride the learning curves, and grow as a person. Even more, I am lucky to have wonderful team with professional skills who mind their own business, and great leader who always shown supports, works hand in hand, and lead us by example.

But this merge and acquisition is truly challenging for me.

My new immediate reporting line keep saying, "owh this new system is different".

I am trying not to complain, because I don't do complaining. But writing objectives every months & being reviewed about it to get salary and performance review is sucks. I hate it.

I just want to do my work and be happy about it - and not being intimidated every WEEK about task reports and objective review. No one in their right project mind have time to do it. 

We are busy, and this is absurd.

.

.

.

To divert myself from this absurdity, I will just feed them with whatever objectives, which, they dont even care about it, and focus on my work. And when I couldn't handle this anymore, I will just, go.

People grow. And be better.

 Ada waktunya dalam hidup ni yang manusia berkembang secara vertical, dan ada waktunya dia menumbuh secara horizontal. 

Dan dalam setiap perkembangan itu, manusia belajar sesuatu yang baru, dan menjadi orang yang lebih baik berbanding sebelumnya.

Ada orang menjadi lebih baik dengan berkahwin, ada orang menjadi lebih baik meskipun masih single, ada orang menjadi lebih manusia semasa dalam proses melahirkan dan membesarkan anak, ada orang menjadi manusia yang lebih manusiawi semasa membela orang tuanya.

We are all in a better journey, with or without realizing about it.

One year wiser

 And. Hey. 2024 is here!

I was pretty much enjoying 2023.. it was a busy year. I enjoyed the ride because I didnt rush for anything. It was a tough year from work perspective, otherwise I enjoyed every moment in 2023.

Having the first overseas hiking in 2023 was a big deal for me.

Letting go of old memories of my old good, best friend was also a big deal, not easy but I did it!

Opening up and allowing myself to know new people is a slow process, but a big leapt as well. 

Life doesn't get easier, but being brave and try to be more accepting is what help me get by. I learn to accept that people will not change according to my desire, but I can change the way I look at things.

And most of the time I am quite surprised of myself...where I believe the previous me wouldnt do what my current self is doing, or taking action, or think like this. I was not this calm before. I was not having this much patience. Here and there, sometimes I was selfish, some other time I was selfless.

So I believe that I am a little wiser. Alhamdulillah.

This year I wont have much target, I will write down my 2024 resolution soon because I dont have resolution in 2023.

2024, bring it on!